I've never been one for New Years Resolutions. For some reason, I always saw them as something someone would write on the 31st and forget about by the 2nd. So, what was the point? I'm not going to say that I'm going to exercise more, because let's face it: running is horrifying. Am I going to eat better? The two biggest loves of my life are doughnuts and pancakes, so probably not.
But, if I'm being completely honest with myself, the reason that I never liked resolutions was because I never wanted to admit that I needed to change anything in my life. But looking back on the past year, I just couldn't escape the fact that I drastically needed to change the way I was living my life.
I'm not saying that 2014 was a horrible year. It was an amazing year and so many great and wonderful things happened. I don't regret anything I did or didn't do. But, something I'm not proud of is how I viewed and approached my life. The majority of my life, I centered my thoughts and feelings around things that I love and am inspired by. I embraced my passions and made my life about them; which has been fulfilling in every way.
This past year, I found my thoughts not centered around the things that I love, but centered around what I think others want from me. I found myself focused not on what I wanted to do with my life, but focused on what I thought, based on society what I should be doing with my life.
When you're in your twenties, it seems as if everyone you know is getting married, having kids, making their own home and working at a cool, hip job. So, I was stuck in the mentality of, "Hey, maybe I should be doing that." And that's what I was focused on this year, which only led to me feeling like, "What am I doing wrong?"
The only thing I was doing wrong was thinking that I wanted those things. None of those things has ever been something I've desperately wanted in my life and by convincing myself that it was, I completely put everything that I am passionate about on the back burner. I lost a part of myself.
So, you know what? I am going to write a New Years Resolution this year, because I do need to change my life. I need to remind myself what I love and what makes me happy and focus on those things this year. And I am so excited about it.
Here are the things that make me happy:
-My beautiful friends
-Spending time with family
-Writing every single day
-Going on photography adventures
-Collaborating and creating
Do you have any New Years Resolutions? What makes you happy?